Enneagram Type Six

The Loyalist

The loyal, trustworthy type.

Overview of The Enneagram 6s

Also known as: The Loyal Sceptic, The Guardian, The Troubleshooter
Core Fear: Of feeling fear itself; of being alone or abandoned and without support or guidance
Core Desire: To have security, support and guidance
Core Weakness: Anxiety – constantly scanning and preparing for worst-case scenarios
Core Strength: Courage – the ability to stand up for yourself and others even when scared
Core Longing (the message your heart longs to hear): “I am safe and secure”
Disintegration under stress: Towards 3
Integration under growth: Towards 9

Common Characteristics of Enneagram 6s

Sixes are committed, dedicated community-builders who love being part of a group. They are emotionally intelligent and have good people skills. Sixes enjoy finding the things that make us universally human and connecting to others on a base level – they have no time for people who try to be better than others.

Sixes focus on protecting their community as much as on protecting themselves, and they like to feel needed within their different social groups. Positive feedback or encouragement from these groups helps them to feel like they are devoting their time to something ‘worthwhile’.

Sixes are loyal and responsible. They take commitments seriously and will always honour what they have agreed to do. They follow through on plans and projects and will rarely let you down.

For sixes, trust does not come easily at first. They are often suspicious, testing people (or ideas) to check that they are worthy of their loyalty. However, once you’ve gained their trust, it’s hard to lose. They become the most faithful friends and advocates you could hope for.

The six is very security-oriented. To them, the world is full of danger that they need to prevent. Because of this they love predictability and stability, and are very thrown by change. They are organised in all areas of life, thinking several steps ahead in order to anticipate what could go wrong. This means that they are excellent trouble-shooters, able to prevent potential stress both for themselves and others. However, it also means they tend to think about the worst-case scenario, which can lead to them seeming pessimistic or negative.

Sixes want this security because they tend to have a lot of deep-seated fear. The six often feels as though they’re not quite standing on solid ground, and they’re scared of what will happen if they move. Interestingly, the six often struggles to identify their fear, as it is so fundamental to the way that they interact with the world that they stop noticing it.

Sixes deal with their fear in different ways. This can lead to them being both difficult to describe and to type. Most people agree on two main ways in which sixes show their fear, often called ‘phobic’ and ‘counterphobic’.

Phobic sixes tend to be submissive and cooperative in their behaviour. They allow other people to make decisions for them as they themselves become paralysed by their fear. They are often open about their feelings and vulnerability, which helps others to understand their situation and empathise with them.

Counterphobic sixes, on the other hand, battle their fear rather than avoid it. They often come across as aggressive or anti-authoritarian, putting up a tough exterior to hide their fear. They might become impulsive or take unnecessary risks in order to rebel against forces or authorities that they distrust.

Although sixes may tend more towards one of these ways of acting than the other, most move between them, being phobic in one situation and counterphobic in another. It’s very unusual for a six to display only one of these coping behaviours.

Sixes often seem contradictory, and one of the main reasons for this is their movement between phobic and counterphobic behaviours. Their constant struggle with their fears means they can seem simultaneously submissive yet defiant, doubting yet believing, cowardly yet courageous.

Although at their worst sixes can be paranoid, contradictory individuals ruled by their anxiety, at their best they are loyal friends and advocates, fighting for the communal good and championing humanity, able to provide safety and security for those around them.

Strengths of Enneagram 6s

Perhaps the biggest strength of the six, particularly when healthy, is their courage. They are able to stand up for what they believe in despite their fear, and to rally others to join them in these causes. Sixes excel at building community and drawing people in with their warm and open personalities.

Sixes are devoted and loyal friends who will always honour commitments and plans that they have made. They are trustworthy and reliable and tend to put others before themselves, easily able to draw on their empathy. They care deeply for other people and show their care willingly.

Sixes are excellent planners. They prepare for every eventuality, and are gifted trouble-shooters. This means they’re often highly valued in the workplace, as they are able to pre-empt and prevent problems. They are also hardworking and conscientious, and good completer-finishers. The industriousness of a healthy six means they are an asset to any organisation.

Due to their tendency to scan for potential problems, sixes are very attuned to their environment. They are detail-oriented and analytical, noticing potential problems that others might overlook. Because of this, they tend to make informed and sensible choices in life. Other people often ask sixes for advice as they know that the six will have considered all sides of an issue.

Unlike many other enneagram types, sixes have easy access to both their emotions and their logic. This means that they are able to be good all-rounders, knowing when to rely on feelings and when to rely on knowledge. They can do big picture as well as detail, and intuition as well as observation.

Challenges of Enneagram 6s

As with all Enneagram types, the challenges faced by the six are often fundamentally linked to their strengths – the two are opposite sides of the same coin.

Sixes have great trouble controlling their anxiety. They always want to do the ‘right thing’, which means they often have difficulty making decisions. This can lead to sixes appearing ambivalent, as they struggle to know which path to take, or even panicky, when their indecision becomes too much to bear.

When in a phobic stance, sixes can be overly submissive, as they want someone else to guide or support them. In extreme cases, this submissiveness can turn into dependency, with the six relying on one figure or organisation for their sense of security and safety.

When in a counterphobic stance, sixes become aggressive or pushy as they try to battle their anxiety. They sometimes lash out at others as they struggle to control their fear. This rebelliousness is not always a weakness, but can be when the six rebels out of fear rather than out of genuine zeal.

Their tendency to over-analyse situations means others often perceive sixes as being pessimistic or negative. This is often surprising to sixes who feel like they are simply doing their due diligence. They view their suspicion and lack of trust as simply necessary, whereas to others it can become wearing and stressful.

Sixes love rules as they feel safe when following a prescribed system. This can lead to them sometimes being seen as bossy or stubborn when they try to force these rules on everyone else. Similarly, they can become overly dependent on a given rule set or system, seeing it as a way to escape their insecurity.

The sixes’ primary defence mechanism is projection. This means that they (often unconsciously) put their feelings onto other people. Unfortunately for the six, these projections can often become self-fulfilling prophecies. As the six generally believes that people are untrustworthy, they behave suspiciously towards people, causing others to back away and leave the six alone. This leaves them in the abandoned state they were trying to avoid in the first place.

In essence, sixes’ fear comes from the fact that they don’t trust themselves. They believe they lack the resources to handle what life may throw at them. Instead, they look for someone or something else in which to place to their trust. Their self-doubt and insecurity is perhaps their biggest challenge, as it forces them to look to a dangerous world for the stability which they crave.

Levels of Development for Enneagram Type 6s

Healthy Levels

At healthy levels, Enneagram Type 6s:

Trust themselves and are self-reliant, being aware of their own weaknesses and strengths
Trust others and are happy to be open and vulnerable with others
Are courageous, taking action act even when fearful or doubting
Are able to focus on the present, and to let go of their worries or expectations
Are dedicated to movements or communities they believe in, and are self-sacrificing in helping these move forwards
Have a positive attitude towards life, not always having to consider every possible negative eventuality
Enjoy bonding with others, are endearing and warm
Are hard-working and persevering in whatever they put their mind to

Average Levels

At average levels, Enneagram Type 6s:

Are organised and structured in their day-to-day life and their view of the world
Are anxious and cautious, constantly trying to find security and safety
Tend to over-analyse and plan for worse-case scenarios
Are often pessimistic, sceptical and suspicious, finding it hard to trust ‘outsiders’
Contradict themselves in words and actions due to their own internal confusion
Don’t trust themselves, suffering from low self-esteem
Look for guidance or approval from an authority in their life
Have a ‘fight flight or freeze’ response to perceived danger, meaning they can be aggressive, evasive, or indecisive

Unhealthy Levels

At unhealthy levels, Enneagram Type 6s:

Are often overworked and prone to stress or burnout
Feel inferior to those around them
Become hypersensitive to criticism and easily feel ‘defeated’ by others or life in general
Often replay their failures over and over in their heads, and tend to distort these memories
Can be cowardly and over-cautious
Become dependent, and cling to a protective figure or group
Become panicky and fearful, often suffering from paranoia
At their most unhealthy, start to self-destruct, lashing out at others and pushing them away
Become obsessed with and terrified by the ideas in their heads

Personal Growth Recommendations for Enneagram Type 6s

These recommendations aim to help sixes themselves achieve healthy levels of development, as well as to give suggestions to others as to how to help the sixes in their lives.

Realise that your fear actually holds you back rather than makes you safe. It doesn’t protect you so much as restrain you
Realise that you tend to over-dramatize negatively. Your worst-scenarios rarely happen!
Try to focus on what has gone well in the past rather than think about what could go wrong in the future
Work on distinguishing the truth from your projections. Try to avoid magnifying problems and try to avoid putting your emotions onto other people
Learn that you cannot plan for every possible eventuality. Insecurity is a part of life, and you need to realise the limits of your control.
Practise making decisions and taking actions even if you’re anxious. Courage doesn’t mean having no fear, it means acting in the face of fear.
Try to sit with your anxiety and be present in it. This will help you to control it, rather than it controlling you.
Learn to have faith and trust your beliefs rather than constantly searching for proof.
Work on becoming more trusting. Try to have more faith in other people, and notice the positives that come out of your trust.
Work on developing confidence in yourself. Even when you don’t prepare and plan, you are still capable of dealing with life.